It seems like this whole classification shitstorm in Australia started with Left for Dead 2. I know there was probably previous titles that were DENIED but it was this particular title that removed our potential to slash, shoot, maim, stab and other wise dismember zombies that really got the Australian gamer community up in arms. It all started because of one little phrase entered in the report that the classification guy wrote up, "rabies-infected humans". The classification board then proceeded to clench it's buttocks so tight that not even full strength Rojan Josh could do anything about it. This is what I imagine the board room sounded like after they submitted the report,
Board Director: Oh! Oh No, we can't possibly have a simulated environment killing real people, people who are alive. WITH RABIES! We can't allow gamers to kill sick people, they can't be allowed to hurt these imaginary alive people!!!! GOD WILL PUNISH THEM RAWRWRAR. THEY HAVE RABIES THEY SHOULD BE IN HOSPITAL!
Intern: Maybe if we replaced the words "rabies infected humans" with Zom-
Board Director: RABIES! it rhymes with BABIES, how foul and twisted are these game developers, Rabies is only one step away from BABIES, i bet they knew that, i bet they are baby killers, THEY WANT ME TO KILL MY BABY!
Intern: But if we just--
Board director: All in favor of not killing my baby? MOTION PASSED, NO LEFT FOR DEAD 2 IN AUSTRALIA.
Anyway that's pretty much how it went down. Like many gamers I was pretty pissed at this since L4D was pretty much zombie game of the decade. I remember when I first played it, I was in cydus in Melbourne, had my head phones on. I was walking really slowly down the corridor in the first part of the Plane Wreck and a ZOMBIE goes "URHHHHHHHHH" out of no-where and I screamed so loudly, and then I remembered where I was and the whole row of the lan cafe was looking at me. Embarrassing! Anyway yes, I wanted to play this game.
I don't think I'm the only one that thought things would improve if Australia got an R18 rating for video games, I mean we all bitched at Conroy and the Australian Classification board but it looks like that didn't do a damn thing. It's like they want us to pirate, they are practically asking us to. Normally I could let one game slide and it wouldn't be the end of the world but this morning, while in bed browsing general haunts like www.geekologie.com and www.australiangamer.com I noticed in amongst posts about 3d porn, robots and dinosaurs that the new MORTAL COMBAT has been refused classification on the grounds of "fatalities" and promoting "lesbian relationships" but the Kinky Wii Sex game has been passed.
Ok Australia seriously, have you seen the shit you put on your TV, an episode of desperate housewives would probably trump Mortal combat for violence and sex. You provide several porn channels on payTV, I've seen documentaries that are more violent than this shit, and they are real. What is the problem, we as a community are trying to compromise. Ok not all gamers are adults, maybe not everyone should be allowed to play violent video games, but have some faith. Sure, some parents are shit (or awesome depending on how you see it) and will buy their kids violent video games but those parents are going to let their kids do what they want anyway. We asked for an R18 rating to assuage concerns about young kids playing inappropriate content, they have so far denied us this. Have some faith that we as adults can decide what we should and shouldn't play. Why does the government have to pretend we all need to be babysat. Not only are they completely overprotective but there doesn't seem to be any hard evidence associating violent video games and long term violent tendencies in adults. I might also remind them that we evolved from races that have long since thrived in enjoying the entertainment of violence and gore, gladiatorial combat for example. Video games aren't even real, why shouldn't we choose the way that we want to entertain ourselves.
So the moral of the story is we should probably all just buy this game online and flip a humongous bird once again to the australian classification board.
oh yeah and don't forget to vote in this months poll =D
